Forget about Learning to Love Your Body

What is one of the hardest things for you to love? While I can’t answer this for everyone, and I’m sure every person has their own unique response, I think that there is a large majority that would answer this question with, “my body,” and to a larger extent, “myself.”

Lately, I’ve been feeling that way too. I think that learning to love your body is one of the hardest things for a modern day woman to do and that maintaining that love is even harder. Why?

We are constantly influenced by society to be thinner, look leaner, have a big butt and a tiny waist. It’s on our Instagram feeds, Facebook feeds, and splattered across magazines. You know this already. But even though we know it and are aware of it, it doesn’t stop it from infiltrating so many aspects of our lives. I’m a certified personal trainer, have been living a healthy lifestyle for years, and even I am not free from these unhealthy thoughts. Here’s why I currently feel bad about my body:

  • It’s winter and I’m not walking or moving nearly as much as I was this summer. I still walk to work and the gym, but I no longer choose to spend my weekends strolling around the city because it’s freezing.
  • Winter also means I’m very pale and I don’t have that sun-kissed glow that makes you look healthy and a little more fit.
  • I started a new exercise program (more to come on that in a couple weeks) where I’m heavy lifting 4 days a week and doing light cardio. While I am noticing results in my arms and legs, my abs are fading slightly since the program calls for very little ab exercises each day  and before the program I was doing an intense ab workout everyday. But I really wanted to follow this program exactly as it describes, so I’m not adding them in.

See? Even as I sit here looking back at all of those reasons I just listed, I know that they’re ridiculous and should not effect how I feel myself or how I see myself. They don’t define my self-worth. Every single thing in that list is temporary and can be changed.

Since this topic has been on my mind so much lately, I’ve been trying to figure out exactly what it is I’m trying to say. This is what I’ve realized:

  • There are going to be bad body days. It’s the society we live in and it’s human nature. Many people preach the power of standing in front of the mirror everyday and telling yourself you are beautiful and sexy and strong. Personally, that doesn’t work for me and I’m not sure how many other people it works for.
  • Harness the power of mind and your thoughts. Instead of learning to love your body, learn to love your mind. That’s where it all starts.

Your thoughts are powerful. Being able to gain control of your mind and your thinking can completely change how you feel about your body image. I’ve been doing it a lot lately and it really does have a positive effect. When you think, “ugh, my thighs are too big,” think instead, “wow, my thighs allow me to squat  a large amount of weight and it makes me feel powerful and strong.” There is always something about your body to be proud of.

You’re not going to wake up tomorrow and instantly love your body. It takes time and effort to replace negative thoughts with positive ones. To get intro the self-love mindset, take time everyday to write down one to three things you’re grateful for. It really does make a huge difference and after a week of this practice you’ll find yourself catching your negative thoughts and quickly replacing them with positive ones.

When it comes down to it, you should just be grateful that you can move your body. There are so many people who can’t—those with injuries, older people who have less mobility, etc.. Being able to  exercise is a blessing, thank your body for being able to do so.

In the end, your body doesn’t define your self-worth. It’s not about likes, comments, or how your abs compare to those of that fitstagram model you love. Unfollow accounts that make you feel bad. Surround yourself with intelligent, kind, honest, and genuine people. These people and these experiences will strengthen your mind, allowing you to see that you are a unique individual, defined by so much more than what you look like.


Related post: Exercise Isn’t Everything

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